Bridge Homework

Tom Helen, I need to tell you something before we record.

Helen We are recording, Tom.

Tom Oh. Well. In that case, I've signed up for beginners' bridge, the class starts Tuesday, and I've just found out there's homework.

Helen There is homework. I'm sorry. I know you left school to get away from it.

Tom I left school to get away from a man called Mister Pritchard. The homework was a side benefit.

Helen Well, this homework involves playing cards, which is legally a game. So it doesn't count.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. One episode for every week of the six-week beginners' course, plus this one, which is the bit before the bit. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I have played zero hands of bridge. I own a pack of cards. I think it's most of a pack.

Helen This is episode zero: before you start. How to use the workbook, how to practise when there are only two of you, and the words you need to know before anyone at the club starts saying them at you very quickly.

Tom As if I was born knowing them.

Helen Exactly as if you were born knowing them.

Helen First, how the workbook works. There's one lesson for each week of the course. After each class, spend about forty-five minutes on your own, and then about an hour with a practice partner.

Tom That's less time than I spend each week choosing what to watch on television.

Helen And at the end of it you'll know Stayman, which television has never once taught anybody.

Tom What's Stayman?

Helen Week three. Be patient. Each lesson has three parts. Key points, which is a short refresher for anyone who spent the class thinking about lunch.

Tom So, me.

Helen Solo exercises, where you decide your answer and write it down before you check. Writing it down matters.

Tom Why? I can just check it in my head.

Helen Because otherwise you'll read the answer and say, "Yes, that's what I was going to say," and we both know you weren't.

Tom That's very hurtful and completely accurate.

Helen And the third part is practising with a partner. The answers are hidden behind a little button at the end of each lesson, because the author believes in you, and also knows you'll peek.

Tom Everyone peeks.

Helen The author admits peeking at their own answers while writing them.

Tom Okay, practical problem. Bridge needs four people. I have one wife, and she has made it clear that she is a practice partner, not a hobby.

Helen That's the most common problem in bridge. It is very hard to find four people who are free at the same time and still like each other. So the workbook gives you a two-person setup.

Tom Go on.

Helen Deal four hands. You sit North, and you turn South face up as your dummy. Your partner sits East and turns West face up as theirs. Each of you plays your own hand and your own dummy.

Tom So I can see half the cards.

Helen Half the cards. It makes learning easier, but it's still a real hand. It's bridge with training wheels, and nobody can see you wobble.

Tom And for bidding?

Helen Deal just two hands, North and South, and put the rest aside. Bid them together as partners with no opponents butting in, then turn both hands face up and check the auction against the lesson.

Tom No opponents. Peace and quiet.

Helen Enjoy it. It never happens at the club.

Helen One more tip. When a quiz shows you a hand, take the actual cards out of the pack and lay them face up in four rows, one row per suit. Then you can play the hand out afterwards. It's the difference between reading about swimming and getting in the pool.

Helen Right, the cards. A normal pack of fifty-two, with the jokers taken out.

Tom Why are the jokers taken out?

Helen The jokers are not invited. Nobody is quite sure what they did, but it was bad, and we don't talk about it.

Tom Noted. Never mention the jokers.

Helen Now some words. The face is the printed side that shows what the card is. The back is the patterned side. Every card's back looks the same.

Tom Which is the entire basis of the game.

Helen Very good. Face up means everyone can see it. Face down means nobody can. In each corner there's a small rank and suit called the index. Hold your cards in a fan so the indexes show. You never need to see the middle of the card.

Tom What's in the middle, then?

Helen Pips. The suit symbols. A seven has seven pips, a two has two. You can see where this is going. The middle is just decoration, like the parsley on a plate.

Tom I always eat the parsley.

Helen Of course you do. Cards from two to ten are spot cards. King, queen and jack are picture cards, also called face cards or court cards.

Tom Three names for one thing?

Helen Bridge players love having three names for everything. And then the ace, the card with one big pip. In bridge it's the highest card in its suit. Don't let it go to its head.

Tom How many suits again? I want to say four, but I don't want to commit.

Helen Commit. Four. Spades, hearts, diamonds and clubs, thirteen cards each, from the ace at the top down to the two at the bottom. Hearts and diamonds are red. Spades and clubs are black.

Tom And every suit has exactly the same thirteen cards?

Helen Exactly the same. There are no surprises. Enjoy that, because it's the last time in bridge that will be true.

Helen In bridge the honours are the ace, king, queen, jack and ten of each suit. And for bidding, the suits have a ranking. Clubs lowest, then diamonds, then hearts, then spades at the top.

Tom Clubs, diamonds, hearts, spades. That's alphabetical!

Helen Alphabetical, for once. Bridge is never this kind again.

Helen Handling the cards. First you shuffle, face down, so the order is random. Then the player on the dealer's right cuts: they lift part of the pack off the top, and the dealer puts the bottom part on top.

Tom Why?

Helen It's a tiny ceremony of trust between people who don't trust each other. Then the dealer deals, one card at a time, face down, clockwise, starting with the player on their left.

Tom And then I pick up my cards.

Helen Not until the deal is finished. I know you want to. Everyone wants to. Sit on your hands if you have to.

Tom And then I pick up my cards.

Helen Then you pick up your cards and sort them. Group them by suit, highest to lowest, and alternate red and black suits so they're easy to tell apart.

Helen Last few words. A trick is one card from each player, four cards in all. To lead is to play the first card to a trick. To follow suit is to play a card of the suit that was led. Trumps are the suit chosen to beat all the other suits.

Tom Trumps. I like the sound of trumps.

Helen Everybody likes trumps. And a void means you have no cards at all in a suit.

Tom That sounds sad.

Helen It sounds sad. It's often wonderful. You'll see why in week one. A singleton is exactly one card in a suit. A doubleton is exactly two.

Tom Void, singleton, doubleton. Zero, one, two. Got it.

Helen Quiz. What's the highest card in a suit?

Tom The ace. Who shouldn't let it go to its head.

Helen Correct. And for bidding, which suit ranks highest?

Tom Spades. Alphabetical. Clubs, diamonds, hearts, spades.

Helen One more. You have no clubs at all. What do you call that?

Tom A void. Which sounds sad, but is often wonderful.

Helen He's a natural.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: take the jokers out, and don't ask. Two: deal face down, clockwise, one at a time, and don't touch your hand until the deal is done. Three: sort your cards by suit, alternating red and black. Four: the suits rank clubs, diamonds, hearts, spades, alphabetical for once. And five: write your answers down before you check them.

Tom And homework?

Helen On your own, shuffle a pack, then sort it into the four suits, each from ace down to two. Time yourself and try to beat it. With your partner, take turns to shuffle, cut and deal four hands. Pick one up, sort it, and read it aloud, suit by suit, highest first. "Spades: ace, queen, four."

Tom Say it with confidence?

Helen Say it with confidence. Confidence is half of bridge. The other half is the cards.

Tom Next time, week one: how the game actually works. Helen says I'll learn the whole game.

Helen Not the whole game well. Nobody has learned the whole game well. But enough to play a hand. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Leave the jokers at home.

Tom Helen, I went to my first class. I played a whole hand of bridge.

Helen And?

Tom And I won a trick with the five of hearts. Over an ace. A five beat an ace, Helen. I felt like I'd robbed a bank.

Helen Welcome to bridge. The aces never quite get over it.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I have now played one hand of bridge, and I'm already insufferable about it.

Helen This is episode one: how the game works. This week you learn the whole game.

Tom The whole game?

Helen Not the whole game well, obviously. People have been trying for a hundred years and they're still writing books about it. But you'll learn enough to play a hand, which is more than most people at your last dinner party could do.

Helen Let's start with tricks. Someone leads a card. Everyone else, in turn, clockwise, must follow suit if they can. That means playing a card of the same suit.

Tom And if I can't?

Helen Then you can play anything you like. The highest card of the suit that was led wins the trick, unless somebody trumps.

Tom Which is what I did with my five of hearts.

Helen Which is what you did. If hearts are trumps and you have no spades, your little heart beats any spade, even the ace. And whoever wins the trick leads to the next one.

Tom There are thirteen tricks, because everyone has thirteen cards.

Helen The maths department signs off on that.

Helen Now, points. To judge how good a hand is, we count high-card points. Ace is four. King is three. Queen is two. Jack is one.

Tom And the rest?

Helen Nothing. The rest are there for moral support. There are forty points in the whole pack, so an average hand has ten.

Tom Four, three, two, one. Ace, king, queen, jack. That's lovely and simple.

Helen Enjoy it. Let's practise. Spades: ace, king, seven, three. Hearts: queen, eight, four. Diamonds: jack, nine, two. Clubs: king, six, five. How many points?

Tom Ace four, king three, that's seven in spades. Queen two, nine. Jack one, ten. King three. Thirteen!

Helen Thirteen. Remember that number. It's going to come up a lot.

Tom Another one.

Helen Spades: queen, jack, ten. Hearts: ace, nine. Diamonds: king, queen, eight, six, four. Clubs: ace, jack, two.

Tom Queen-jack, three. Ace, seven. King-queen, five more is twelve. Ace-jack, five more. Seventeen.

Helen Seventeen. That's a very nice hand. You're allowed to smile at that one. Silently.

Helen Next, the contract. During the auction, a side promises to win a certain number of tricks. The first six tricks are called the book, and they don't count. So the number you bid is how many tricks you need on top of six.

Tom So if I bid one spade, I need seven tricks.

Helen Seven. And four spades?

Tom Six plus four. Ten.

Helen Good. Quick-fire. Two hearts?

Tom Eight.

Helen Three no-trump?

Tom Nine.

Helen Six spades?

Tom Twelve. That sounds like a lot.

Helen That's a slam. We'll get there in week five. And five clubs?

Tom Eleven.

Helen Perfect score. Don't let it go to your head either.

Helen Now, some contracts are called games. Bid and make a game, and you get a big bonus. The game contracts are three no-trump, four hearts, four spades, five clubs and five diamonds.

Tom Why do clubs and diamonds need five? That seems unfair.

Helen Clubs and diamonds are the minor suits, and they score less per trick. Hearts and spades are the majors. No-trump scores best of all for the first trick. So to reach game, the minors have to work harder. Week six explains the arithmetic.

Tom So the minors are economy class.

Helen That's exactly what they are. Quiz: which of these are games? Three spades. Three no-trump. Four diamonds. Four hearts. Five clubs.

Tom Three no-trump, yes. Four hearts, yes. Five clubs, yes. Three spades is one short. And four diamonds is a minor, so it needs five.

Helen Correct. Three spades and four diamonds are part-scores. Nice contracts, no big bonus.

Helen Last thing this week: playing a suit. Here's the rule. Play the high card from the shorter hand first.

Tom Why the shorter hand?

Helen So you don't get stuck. Say you hold ace, queen, seven, three of hearts. Dummy has king, two. What do you play first?

Tom The ace? It's the biggest.

Helen Biggest isn't the point. Dummy is the short hand, so play dummy's king first. Then lead dummy's two over to your ace and queen. If you play the ace first, dummy's king is left on its own. You win the next trick with it, and now you're stuck in dummy with no hearts left to get back to your queen.

Tom Like locking yourself out of the house with the keys on the kitchen bench.

Helen Exactly like that. So how many tricks can you be sure of?

Tom King, ace, queen. Three?

Helen Three sure tricks. And a fourth if the six hearts you're missing split three and three, because then your seven is the last heart standing.

Tom The seven! Moral support no more.

Helen One more quiz, and it's your favourite. Hearts are trumps. A spade is led. You have no spades, but you have the five of hearts and the ace of clubs. Which one wins the trick?

Tom The five of hearts. The ace of clubs isn't a spade and it isn't a trump, so it's just a discard.

Helen A five beat an ace. This is the question where a lot of people learn that an ace is not always the boss. It's humbling.

Tom For the ace.

Helen For the ace.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: follow suit if you can, and the highest card of the suit led wins, unless someone trumps. Two: ace four, king three, queen two, jack one, forty in the pack. Three: you need six tricks of book plus the number you bid. Four: the games are three no-trump, four hearts, four spades, five clubs and five diamonds. And five: play the high card from the shorter hand first.

Tom Homework?

Helen With your partner, do a point race. Each deal yourselves thirteen cards, count the points aloud, then swap and check each other's. Then add up all four hands. It must come to forty.

Tom And if it doesn't?

Helen Then someone can't count, and it's time for an honest conversation. Then play minibridge. Deal four hands using the two-person setup. The side with more points declares and picks trumps or no-trump. Play six hands. And finish with a trick race in no-trump with no bidding. The point is practising following suit and cashing your winners. Not gloating.

Tom When do we learn gloating?

Helen Lesson seven. Which doesn't exist.

Tom Next time, week two: opening the bidding. Helen says bidding is a conversation with only fifteen words.

Helen And two strangers listening in, trying to ruin it. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Bring a five of hearts.

Tom Helen, my wife and I tried bidding last night.

Helen How did it go?

Tom I opened one heart. She said two hearts. Then she said, "Why are you looking at me like that?" And I said, "I'm not allowed to say."

Helen That's bidding. A conversation where every word counts and somebody is always judging.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I now know fifteen words of a new language, and I'm already using them wrong.

Helen This is episode two: opening the bidding and responding. Bidding is a conversation between you and your partner using only fifteen words, while two strangers listen in and try to ruin it.

Tom It's like texting your spouse with your mother-in-law reading over your shoulder.

Helen It's exactly like that. We play Standard American Yellow Card, and here's how to start the conversation.

Helen When do you open? With twelve or more high-card points. Or with a bit less, if your hand has shape. That's the Rule of Twenty.

Tom Which is?

Helen Add your points to the number of cards in your two longest suits. If you get twenty, open.

Tom Do one.

Helen Ace, ten, eight, six, four of spades. A singleton heart. King, queen, jack, nine, three of diamonds. Eight, five of clubs. Ten points.

Tom Ten, plus five spades, plus five diamonds. Twenty. So I open!

Helen You open. Shape is like charisma. It makes up for a lot.

Helen Now, what do you open? Work down this list. With a balanced hand of fifteen to seventeen points, open one no-trump. Balanced means no void, no singleton, and at most one doubleton.

Tom And bigger than that?

Helen Balanced twenty or twenty-one, open two no-trump. Otherwise you open a suit. And here's the big one in our system: five-card majors. You only open one heart or one spade with five or more cards in that suit.

Tom And with two five-card suits?

Helen Open the higher-ranking one. Without a five-card major, open your longer minor. If your minors are three and three, open one club. Four and four, open one diamond.

Tom So one club might only be three clubs.

Helen It might. Clubs are used to it.

Helen Let's try some. You're the dealer. Spades: king, queen, eight, five. Hearts: ace, jack, six, three. Diamonds: seven, two. Clubs: king, nine, four.

Tom Thirteen points. Four spades, four hearts. No five-card major. So I open my longer minor. Three clubs, two diamonds. One club.

Helen One club. And you'll show a major next time. Next. Ace, seven of spades. King, queen, ten, nine, six of hearts. Ace, eight, four of diamonds. Ten, five, three of clubs.

Tom Thirteen points, five hearts. One heart.

Helen Lovely. King, jack, four of spades. Ace, ten, three of hearts. King, queen, five of diamonds. Queen, eight, six, two of clubs.

Tom Four, eight, thirteen, fifteen. And it's balanced. One no-trump!

Helen One no-trump. Now jack, eight, five of spades. Queen, seven, four of hearts. King, six, three of diamonds. Queen, jack, five, two of clubs.

Tom Nine points. Flat as a pancake. Pass?

Helen Pass. You have a lovely personality, but that doesn't count. Last one. King, nine, seven, six of spades. Eight, five of hearts. Ace, queen, six, four of diamonds. Ace, seven, three of clubs.

Tom Thirteen. Only four spades, so no major. Longer minor is diamonds. One diamond.

Helen Five for five. Your mother-in-law would be proud.

Tom She'd find something.

Helen Now the other side of the conversation. Partner opens. What do you say?

Tom I'm guessing "nice one" isn't on the list.

Helen It is not. Here's the menu. With six or more points, you have to say something. A new suit at the one level shows six or more points and four or more cards. Raising partner's major to the two level shows three-card support and six to ten points. Jumping to the three level is a limit raise: support and ten to twelve. One no-trump means six to ten with nothing else to say.

Tom And a new suit at the two level?

Helen That shows ten or more points. It's more expensive, so it needs more.

Helen Partner opens one heart. Eight, six, four of spades. King, nine, seven, three of hearts. Queen, ten, five of diamonds. Jack, six, two of clubs.

Tom Six points, and four hearts. Partner has at least five. So we have at least nine hearts between us. Two hearts.

Helen Two hearts. You found a fit. Next. Ace, queen, seven, five of spades. Six, two of hearts. King, eight, four, three of diamonds. Nine, seven, five of clubs.

Tom Nine points, four spades. A new suit at the one level. One spade.

Helen Yes. Show your four-card major. King, seven of spades. Queen, jack, eight, four of hearts. Ace, nine, six, three of diamonds. Ten, eight, two of clubs.

Tom Ten points and heart support. That's a limit raise. Three hearts.

Helen Three hearts. Nine, five of spades. Eight, three of hearts. King, jack, seven, four of diamonds. Queen, ten, six, five, three of clubs.

Tom Six points. I'd like to bid my clubs, but that's the two level, and that needs ten. So, one no-trump.

Helen One no-trump. Six to ten, nothing else to say. Seven, four, two of spades. Jack, six of hearts. Nine, eight, five, three of diamonds. Queen, seven, six, four of clubs.

Tom Three points. Pass.

Helen Pass. Let partner have their moment. And finally, king, ten, three of spades. Seven, two of hearts. Ace, queen, nine of diamonds. King, jack, eight, six, four of clubs.

Tom Thirteen points, five clubs. Two clubs. A new suit at the two level, ten or more.

Helen Perfect. Six for six.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: open with twelve or more, or use the Rule of Twenty. Two: balanced fifteen to seventeen, open one no-trump; twenty to twenty-one, open two no-trump. Three: five-card majors, and with two five-card suits open the higher. Four: no five-card major, open your longer minor. And five: as responder, a new suit at the one level shows six-plus, a raise shows support and six to ten, and a new suit at the two level shows ten-plus.

Tom Homework?

Helen Three drills with your partner. First, open-or-pass. Deal four hands, and each of you looks at two hands in turn and announces the opening bid or "pass". Do ten deals.

Tom Saying "pass" firmly.

Helen Saying "pass" firmly is a skill. Practise it in other areas of your life too. Second, two-hand auctions. Deal North and South only. North opens, South responds, then turn both hands up and see if you found your eight-card fit. And on the last four deals, bid all the way to a contract and play it.

Tom Next time, week three: transfers. Helen says I'm going to bid diamonds when I've got hearts. On purpose.

Helen You will. And you'll love it. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Pass firmly.

Tom Helen, something terrible happened at class. The teacher told us that if partner opens one no-trump and I have hearts, I should bid diamonds.

Helen That's right.

Tom I laughed. I thought it was a prank on the new guy.

Helen To be fair, it often is a prank on the new guy. But not this time. Transfers are real, everyone plays them, and by the end of this episode you'll be explaining them to people who didn't ask.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I can now open the bidding and respond, and I've started saying "pass" firmly at the supermarket.

Helen This is episode three: opener's rebid and no-trump bidding. Two big ideas. What opener says the second time, and what to do when partner opens one no-trump.

Helen Opener's second bid, the rebid, tells partner how strong you are. Think of it in three bands. Twelve to fifteen is a minimum. Sixteen to eighteen is medium. Nineteen to twenty-one is maximum.

Tom Like small, medium and large coffee.

Helen Exactly. And partner is trying to work out how big a cup to bring. Now, balanced hands. Fifteen to seventeen balanced, you've already opened one no-trump. But what about twelve to fourteen balanced?

Tom Too small for one no-trump.

Helen So you open a suit, and then rebid one no-trump. That says: balanced, twelve to fourteen. And with eighteen or nineteen balanced, too big for one no-trump, you open a suit and then jump to two no-trump.

Tom So the no-trump bids sort of fence off the ranges. Twelve to fourteen, fifteen to seventeen, eighteen to nineteen, twenty to twenty-one.

Helen That's a lovely way to put it, Tom. Did someone tell you that?

Tom I'm as surprised as you are.

Helen Let's practise. You opened one diamond, and partner responded one spade. What's your rebid? King, five of spades. Queen, eight, three of hearts. Ace, jack, seven, four of diamonds. King, ten, six, two of clubs.

Tom Three, five, ten, thirteen. Balanced. So one no-trump. Twelve to fourteen.

Helen One no-trump. Next. Queen, jack, seven, three of spades. A singleton heart. Ace, king, nine, eight, five of diamonds. King, four, two of clubs.

Tom Thirteen points. And four spades! Partner bid spades, so I support. A minimum, so two spades.

Helen Two spades. A minimum with four-card support. Next. Ace, six of spades. King, four of hearts. Ace, queen, jack, ten, seven, four of diamonds. King, eight, three of clubs.

Tom Four, seven, fourteen, seventeen. Seventeen is medium. And six good diamonds. Three diamonds?

Helen Three diamonds. Medium strength with a strong six-card suit. Now ace, king, eight, two of spades. A singleton heart. Ace, queen, nine, six, three of diamonds. Ace, jack, seven of clubs.

Tom Seven, thirteen, eighteen. Eighteen points and four spades and a singleton. That's... a lot.

Helen It's worth game. Four spades. And last. King, four of spades. Ace, queen, six of hearts. Ace, jack, eight, five of diamonds. King, queen, seven, two of clubs.

Tom Three, nine, fourteen, nineteen. Balanced nineteen. Jump to two no-trump.

Helen Two no-trump. You're getting good at this, and I find it unsettling.

Helen Now, partner opens one no-trump. Fifteen to seventeen, balanced. Your first job is to add up. Partner's points plus yours. Twenty-five or more, and you want to be in game.

Tom And if I have a four-card major?

Helen Then you want to know if partner has four too, because an eight-card major fit plays better than no-trump. So you ask, with two clubs. That's Stayman.

Tom Stayman! The thing from week zero.

Helen The very same. Two clubs over one no-trump says nothing about clubs. It asks, "Partner, do you have a four-card major?" You need about eight points and a four-card major to use it. Partner answers two diamonds for no four-card major, two hearts for four hearts, or two spades for four spades.

Tom And if partner has both majors?

Helen Show hearts first. Try one. You opened one no-trump with ace, queen, seven, three of spades. King, jack, eight, two of hearts. King, five of diamonds. Queen, six, four of clubs. Partner bids two clubs.

Tom Both majors, so hearts first. Two hearts.

Helen Two hearts. Lovely.

Helen Now the bit that made you laugh. Transfers. Over one no-trump, two diamonds says, "I have five or more hearts. Please bid two hearts." And two hearts says, "I have five or more spades. Please bid two spades."

Tom So I bid the suit below the one I want.

Helen You bid the suit below, and partner bids the one you actually have.

Tom Why not just bid my suit?

Helen Two reasons. One: it lets you show a long major with any strength, from nothing at all to a slam. Two: it makes the one no-trump hand declarer. So the opening lead comes up to partner's good cards instead of through them.

Tom Sneaky.

Helen Sneaky. Legal. Beautiful. The strong hand hides its good cards from the opening lead like a squirrel with a nut.

Helen Partner opens one no-trump. What's your plan? King, nine, six, four of spades. Queen, ten, seven, three of hearts. Ace, eight, two of diamonds. Seven, five of clubs.

Tom Nine points, and four of each major. Stayman. Two clubs.

Helen And then? If partner bids two hearts or two spades, you raise to the three level. That's invitational: partner bids game with a maximum. If partner says two diamonds, no major, you bid two no-trump. Next. Eight, five of spades. Jack, nine, seven, six, four, two of hearts. Queen, six of diamonds. Ten, five, three of clubs.

Tom Three points. But six hearts. Transfer! Two diamonds. Partner bids two hearts, and I pass.

Helen Exactly. You're weak, but hearts plays better than one no-trump. Ace, jack, eight, seven, five of spades. King, three of hearts. Queen, nine, six of diamonds. Eight, four, two of clubs.

Tom Ten points, five spades. Transfer with two hearts. Partner bids two spades. Then I bid... three no-trump?

Helen Three no-trump. That says, "I have five spades and enough for game. You choose." Partner picks four spades with three or more spades, and passes otherwise.

Tom That's genuinely clever.

Helen Queen, seven, two of spades. King, eight, five of hearts. Ace, ten, six, three of diamonds. Jack, nine, four of clubs.

Tom Ten points, balanced, no four-card major. So no Stayman, no transfer. Ten plus fifteen is twenty-five. Three no-trump!

Helen Simple. Enjoy it. And six, three of spades. Nine, eight, four of hearts. Queen, eight, seven, five, two of diamonds. Jack, six, three of clubs.

Tom Three points. Pass.

Helen Pass. Partner will be fine. Partner is always fine. Partner has fifteen to seventeen.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: opener's rebid shows strength: twelve to fifteen minimum, sixteen to eighteen medium, nineteen to twenty-one maximum. Two: balanced twelve to fourteen, open a suit and rebid one no-trump; balanced eighteen to nineteen, open a suit and jump to two no-trump. Three: over one no-trump, two clubs is Stayman, with about eight points and a four-card major. Four: two diamonds is a transfer to hearts, and two hearts is a transfer to spades. And five: replies to Stayman are two diamonds for no major, two hearts for four hearts, and two spades for four spades.

Tom Homework?

Helen The one no-trump drill. Give North a balanced fifteen to seventeen. Keep re-dealing until it qualifies.

Tom Isn't that cheating?

Helen Yes, and it's allowed in homework. Deal South at random, bid with Stayman or transfers, then turn both hands up and check. Ten deals, swapping every five. Then the rebid ladder: North opens, South responds at the one level, and North says the rebid out loud with the range it shows. "One no-trump, twelve to fourteen." And South checks, ideally without smirking. Then play two transfer hands, and watch the strong hand end up as declarer.

Tom Next time, week four: competitive bidding. Helen says the opponents are going to stop being polite.

Helen They are going to start interrupting. And so are you. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Bid diamonds. Mean hearts.

Tom Helen, I need to complain about the opponents.

Helen Already?

Tom For three weeks they sat there and said "pass". Lovely people. Then on Tuesday I opened one heart, and the man on my left said "one spade". Just like that. Right in the middle of my auction.

Helen Welcome to competitive bidding. It's the only place in polite society where you can cut someone off mid-sentence and they'll compliment you on it afterwards.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I can bid Stayman and transfers, and I have explained them to three people who did not ask.

Helen This is episode four: competitive bidding and preempts. Up until now the opponents have been polite. That ends today. This episode is about interrupting, which bridge players have turned into an art form.

Helen When an opponent opens, you have four main ways to interrupt. First, the overcall. You bid your own suit. You need a good five-card suit or longer. At the one level, eight to sixteen points. At the two level, eleven to sixteen, because it's riskier.

Tom Why such a low minimum? Eight points is nothing.

Helen Because an overcall isn't really saying "we can make game". It's saying "partner, lead this suit", and "opponents, I'm in your way". Both of those are very useful.

Tom So it's a bit of a nuisance bid.

Helen It's a professional nuisance. Second, the one no-trump overcall. Fifteen to eighteen points, balanced, and a stopper in their suit.

Tom What's a stopper?

Helen A card that stops them running their suit. An ace, or a king-and-a-bit, or a queen-and-two-bits. If they lead their suit, you can win a trick in it eventually.

Helen Third, the takeout double. This is the clever one. When you double their opening at the one level, it doesn't mean "I think you'll go down". It means "partner, please pick a suit".

Tom Wait, double means bid?

Helen In this spot, yes. You need about twelve points or more, shortness in their suit, and support for all the other suits. The ideal shape is short in their suit and four cards in each of the others.

Tom So whatever suit partner picks, I've got four cards in it.

Helen You are the most accommodating person at the table. And here's the important bit: when partner makes a takeout double and the next player passes, you must bid. Even with nothing.

Tom Even with nothing?

Helen Even with nothing. Pick your longest unbid suit and try not to let your face show anything.

Helen And fourth, preempts. These are for when you have a weak hand with a long suit. A weak two: open two diamonds, two hearts or two spades with five to eleven points and a good six-card suit.

Tom Not two clubs?

Helen Two clubs is for very strong hands. That's next week. With a seven-card suit and a weak hand, you can open at the three level.

Tom Why bid high with a weak hand? That seems backwards.

Helen Because it uses up the opponents' bidding space. They have to start their conversation at the three level, and they often get it wrong. And a long suit takes lots of tricks even without points. That's the whole dirty secret of preempting.

Helen Quiz. Your right-hand opponent opens one heart. What do you do? King, queen, jack, eight, four of spades. Seven, three of hearts. Ace, six, two of diamonds. Nine, five, three of clubs.

Tom Ten points, and a really nice five-card spade suit. Overcall. One spade.

Helen One spade. Next. Ace, eight, five, two of spades. A singleton heart. King, queen, seven, three of diamonds. Ace, ten, eight, four of clubs.

Tom Thirteen points. Short in hearts. Four of everything else. That's the takeout double shape!

Helen Double. King, seven of spades. Ace, queen, nine of hearts. King, jack, eight, four of diamonds. Queen, ten, six, two of clubs.

Tom Fifteen points, balanced, and ace-queen of hearts stops their suit. One no-trump.

Helen One no-trump. Eight, six of spades. King, nine, four of hearts. Ace, queen, jack, ten, seven of diamonds. King, five, two of clubs.

Tom Thirteen points, good diamonds. Overcall at the two level. Two diamonds.

Helen Yes. Eleven to sixteen at the two level, and you've got thirteen. And queen, seven, four of spades. King, jack, eight of hearts. Nine, six, three of diamonds. Queen, ten, five, two of clubs.

Tom Eight points. No five-card suit. And my best cards are in their suit. Pass?

Helen Pass. Sit quietly and look wise. That's half of competitive bidding, and the hardest half.

Helen Now your partner doubles. Left-hand opponent opened one heart, partner doubles, right-hand opponent passes. Nine, seven, six, three of spades. Eight, five, four of hearts. Ten, seven, two of diamonds. Jack, six, three of clubs.

Tom One point. Oh no. I have to bid.

Helen You have to bid.

Tom Longest unbid suit is spades. One spade. And I'm making my face do nothing.

Helen Perfect face. And king, queen, eight, five of spades. Nine, six, three of hearts. Ace, seven, two of diamonds. Ten, eight, four of clubs.

Tom Nine points. Spades again. But this time I've actually got something. Do I jump?

Helen You jump. Two spades shows about nine to eleven. Partner will be delighted.

Helen Last set. You're dealer, nobody vulnerable. What do you open? King, queen, ten, nine, six, four of spades. Seven, three of hearts. Eight, five, two of diamonds. Jack, four of clubs.

Tom Six points. Six good spades. Weak two. Two spades.

Helen Two spades. Eight, four of spades. Ace, jack, ten, eight, seven, five of hearts. Queen, six of diamonds. Nine, seven, three of clubs.

Tom Seven points, six good hearts. Two hearts.

Helen Two hearts. A singleton spade. Nine, four of hearts. King, queen, jack, ten, eight, six, three of diamonds. Eight, five, two of clubs.

Tom Seven diamonds! Weak, seven-card suit. Three diamonds.

Helen Three diamonds. A singleton spade. Jack, eight, seven, six, five, three of hearts. King, four, two of diamonds. Queen, seven, three of clubs.

Tom Six hearts, six points. Two hearts?

Helen Look at the hearts again.

Tom Jack, eight, seven, six, five, three. Oh. That's not a good suit. That's six cards standing near each other.

Helen Pass. The suit is too weak for a weak two. There's weak, and there's too weak. And finally, ace, queen, jack, nine, seven, five of spades. King, four of hearts. Ace, eight, three of diamonds. Seven, two of clubs.

Tom Fourteen points. Six good spades. Too strong for a weak two. One spade.

Helen One spade. A weak two promises a weak hand. Partner's going to rely on that.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: an overcall shows a good five-card suit, eight to sixteen at the one level, eleven to sixteen at the two level. Two: a one no-trump overcall is fifteen to eighteen, balanced, with a stopper. Three: a takeout double shows twelve-plus, shortness in their suit and support for the others, and partner must bid. Four: a weak two is five to eleven points with a good six-card suit. And five: with a weak hand and seven cards, preempt at the three level.

Tom Homework?

Helen The interference drill. Deal four hands. You hold West, partner holds North. If East has an opening hand, East opens, and then West and North each decide what to do. Turn all the hands up and discuss.

Tom Discuss, not argue.

Helen There's a difference, and the club committee is very clear on it. Then the weak-two hunt: deal twenty hands, one at a time, and put any weak twos or preempts in a pile. Compare piles with your partner. And play two preempt hands as declarer. Count your losers. It's usually fewer than the points suggest.

Tom Next time, week five: big hands and slams. Helen says I might pick up a hand so good I have to stop myself from smiling.

Helen And you'll learn the most important habit in bridge: making a plan before you play. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Interrupt politely.

Tom Helen, I picked up a hand on Tuesday with twenty-two points.

Helen Congratulations. What did you do?

Tom I smiled. Out loud, somehow. The man on my left looked at me and said, "Oh dear," and he passed, and so did everyone else, and we played two no-trump, and made twelve tricks.

Helen So this is a good week for you to be learning about big hands.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. I can now interrupt the opponents, and I've been told I do it with real enthusiasm.

Helen This is episode five: strong hands, slams and declarer play. Some days you pick up a hand so good you have to stop yourself from smiling.

Tom I've had that day. I failed.

Helen This episode is about those days. And it's also about the single most important habit in bridge: stopping to make a plan before you play to the first trick.

Helen First, the biggest opening bid in our system: two clubs. It shows twenty-two or more points, or an unbalanced hand with about nine playing tricks. It says nothing about clubs.

Tom Of course it doesn't. Nothing in this game is about what it says. Hang on. Twenty-two points. So on Tuesday I should have opened two clubs.

Helen You should. Partner would have kept bidding, and you'd have found your slam instead of making twelve tricks in two no-trump.

Helen Partner's normal reply is two diamonds, which is a waiting bid. It says nothing about diamonds, either. It just says, "I'm listening. Tell me more."

Tom And can partner pass two clubs if they've got nothing?

Helen Never. You must not pass two clubs, no matter how sorry you feel for yourself. And with twenty or twenty-one balanced, remember, you open two no-trump.

Helen Try these. You're dealer. Ace, king, queen, nine, seven, five of spades. Ace, king, four of hearts. Ace, six of diamonds. Eight, three of clubs.

Tom Nine, sixteen, twenty. Twenty points. That's not twenty-two. But it's unbalanced.

Helen Count your tricks. Six spades, the ace and king of hearts, and the ace of diamonds.

Tom Six, eight, nine. Nine tricks! Two clubs.

Helen Two clubs. Then after partner's two diamonds, you rebid two spades. And ace, queen, five of spades. King, jack, seven of hearts. Ace, king, eight, four of diamonds. King, ten, three of clubs.

Tom Six, ten, seventeen, twenty. Balanced. Two no-trump.

Helen Two no-trump. And now you're on the other side. Partner opens two clubs. You hold eight, six, three of spades. Queen, nine, seven, four of hearts. Jack, five, two of diamonds. Ten, eight, six of clubs.

Tom Three points. Every fibre of my being wants to pass. Two diamonds.

Helen Two diamonds. The waiting bid. Very brave.

Helen Now, slams. A small slam is twelve tricks. A grand slam is all thirteen. As a rough guide, a small slam needs about thirty-three points between you, and a grand slam needs about thirty-seven.

Tom So if I can add up to thirty-three, I just bid six?

Helen Often, yes. Partner opens one no-trump, fifteen to seventeen. You hold ace, queen, four of spades. King, jack, six of hearts. King, queen, ten, five of diamonds. Queen, jack, three of clubs.

Tom Six, ten, fifteen, eighteen. Eighteen plus at least fifteen is thirty-three. Six no-trump!

Helen Six no-trump. Straight there. No fuss.

Helen But sometimes you need to check you're not missing two aces before you bid a slam. That's Blackwood. You bid four no-trump, and it asks partner how many aces they have.

Tom And partner answers how?

Helen Five clubs means none or four. Five diamonds is one. Five hearts is two. Five spades is three.

Tom None or four? How do you tell the difference?

Helen You'll know. If you're asking and you hold no aces, partner has four. If you hold some, partner has none. Try it. Partner bids four no-trump. You hold ace, eight, seven of spades. King, queen, nine of hearts. Ace, six, four, three of diamonds. Jack, ten, five of clubs.

Tom Two aces. Five hearts.

Helen Five hearts. And king, queen, six of spades. Jack, nine, eight, four of hearts. King, seven, two of diamonds. Queen, ten, three of clubs.

Tom No aces. Five clubs. Said proudly.

Helen Said proudly. Now, one warning. Don't use Blackwood when you have a void. Say hearts are agreed, and you hold no spades at all, ace, king, queen, nine, seven, six of hearts, king, queen, jack, four of diamonds, and ace, eight, five of clubs. Should you bid four no-trump?

Tom I want to say yes, because that hand is gorgeous.

Helen It is gorgeous. But no. If partner shows one ace, you won't know which one. If it's the ace of spades, it's useless to you, because you've got no spades. Hands like these use cue-bidding, which is beyond this course.

Tom Something to look forward to.

Helen Something to look forward to.

Helen Now, the most important habit in bridge. Before you play to the first trick, stop and make a plan. In no-trump, count your winners. In a suit contract, count your losers.

Tom I have a confession. I just play the first card that looks nice.

Helen Everybody does that for years. I'd like you to be better than everybody, and frankly the bar is low. So, a plan. One tool is the finesse. You hold seven, five, two of spades. Dummy holds ace, queen, three. How do you try for two spade tricks?

Tom Play the ace, and then hope the king falls?

Helen The king won't fall. Instead, lead the two from your hand, towards dummy. If West plays low, you play the queen.

Tom And if West has the king, the queen wins, because West has already played.

Helen Exactly. Then the ace is a second trick. A finesse works about half the time. It is, in essence, a coin toss that makes you look clever.

Tom My favourite kind of coin toss.

Helen One more. You're in four spades. West leads the king of hearts. You hold ace, king, jack, seven, six of spades. Eight, four of hearts. Ace, seven, three of diamonds. King, queen, two of clubs. Dummy has queen, ten, five, two of spades. Ace, nine, six, three of hearts. Six, two of diamonds. Eight, seven, five of clubs. Count your losers.

Tom Spades, none. Hearts, eight-four. Dummy's ace wins one, so one loser. Diamonds, ace, seven, three. Two losers. Clubs, king-queen-two. They've got the ace. One loser. That's four.

Helen Four losers, and you can afford three. One too many. How do you get rid of one?

Tom Dummy only has two diamonds. So... I could trump a diamond in dummy?

Helen Yes. Play the ace of diamonds and another diamond. Then trump your third diamond in dummy. Down to three losers.

Tom Then draw trumps!

Helen Careful. Keep a trump in dummy for that ruff. If you draw all the trumps first, dummy will have nothing left to ruff with, and you'll have outsmarted yourself.

Tom I outsmart myself most weeks.

Helen Count your losers. Make a plan. Then make a plan for your plan. That's how the good players do it. They're insufferable, and they win.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: open two clubs with twenty-two or more, or about nine playing tricks, and partner's two diamonds is a waiting bid. Two: open two no-trump with twenty to twenty-one balanced. Three: a small slam needs about thirty-three points, a grand slam about thirty-seven. Four: four no-trump is Blackwood, and don't use it when you hold a void. And five: before trick one, count your winners or your losers, and make a plan.

Tom Homework?

Helen Set up the four spades hand. Lay out your hand and dummy, and give your partner the other twenty-six cards in two random hands. Play it five times, then swap. Then the finesse drill: ace, queen, three in dummy, seven, five, two in your hand, and partner secretly puts the king with East or West. Play it ten times and keep score.

Tom And if the finesse wins all ten times?

Helen Your partner is being nice to you. Thank them. And finally, big-hand bidding. Deal North twenty or more points, re-dealing until it qualifies, and bid to the best contract, with Blackwood where it fits. Bask in it. Hands like these are rarer in real life.

Tom Next time, the last week: defence and scoring. Helen says bridge was secretly an accounting exam all along.

Helen It was. Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework.

Tom See you at the table. Make a plan. Then make a plan for your plan.

Tom Helen, on Tuesday I was defending, and my partner played the nine of spades on my ace. And then she looked at me.

Helen What kind of look?

Tom A meaningful look. I didn't know what it meant. I assumed I'd left the oven on.

Helen She was signalling, Tom. With the nine. Not with her face. The face was just frustration.

Helen Welcome to Bridge Homework, the podcast that goes with the Bridge Self-Study Workbook. I'm Helen. I've been playing for longer than I'll admit on a recording.

Tom And I'm Tom. This is the last week of the course, and I can now bid a slam, which I have done once, and made, which I will be mentioning for some time.

Helen This is episode six: defence and scoring. Half the time you won't be declarer. You'll be defending, working with your partner to stop the other side, using only the cards you play to send each other messages.

Tom Like passing notes in class.

Helen Except the teacher is allowed to read them, and you're not allowed to write words.

Helen Defence starts with the opening lead. It's the only card you play before you see dummy, so it's a bit of a guess. But it's an educated guess. Against no-trump, lead the top of a sequence, like king from king-queen-jack. Otherwise, lead the fourth highest of your longest suit.

Tom Fourth highest. So count down from the top.

Helen Count down from the top. From king, ten, seven, five, two, the fourth highest is the five. The idea in no-trump is to set up your long suit, so your little cards become winners.

Tom Moral support finally pays off.

Helen It does. Against a suit contract, it's different. Long suits don't help as much, because declarer can trump. So you lead partner's suit if they've bid one, or the top of a sequence, or a singleton, hoping to trump later. And don't lead away from an ace.

Tom Why not?

Helen Because against a suit contract, you might never get your ace back. Declarer trumps it later and you sit there holding a very expensive card.

Helen One more. If you're leading partner's suit and you have three cards headed by an honour, like queen, seven, three, lead the low one.

Helen Quiz. What do you lead? Against three no-trump. King, queen, jack, seven of spades. Eight, five of hearts. Ten, seven, six, four, two of diamonds. Nine, three of clubs.

Tom Diamonds is longer, but spades has king, queen, jack. That's a sequence. King of spades.

Helen King of spades. A strong sequence beats a weak long suit. Against three no-trump again. Nine, three of spades. King, ten, seven, five, two of hearts. Queen, eight, four of diamonds. Jack, six, three of clubs.

Tom Longest suit is hearts, no sequence. Fourth highest. King, ten, seven, five. The five of hearts.

Helen Five of hearts. Now against four spades. Seven, four of spades. Queen, jack, ten, five of hearts. Ace, eight, six, three of diamonds. Nine, seven, two of clubs.

Tom Suit contract. Don't lead away from the ace of diamonds. Hearts has queen, jack, ten. Top of a sequence. Queen of hearts.

Helen Queen of hearts. And against four hearts, after partner overcalled diamonds. Jack, eight, five, two of spades. Nine, four of hearts. Queen, seven, three of diamonds. King, ten, six, four of clubs.

Tom Partner bid diamonds. I've got queen, seven, three. Three cards headed by an honour, so lead low. Three of diamonds.

Helen Three of diamonds. Partner bid it. Partner wants it led. Partner will remember if you don't.

Tom Partner remembers everything.

Helen Partners always do.

Helen Now signals. When partner leads and you follow, the card you play sends a message. A high card encourages: "I like this suit, keep going." A low card discourages: "Try something else."

Tom So that's what the nine was. My wife was saying "keep going".

Helen Let's see. Against four hearts, partner leads the ace of spades. You hold king, nine, two of spades. What do you play?

Tom I've got the king. So I want partner to carry on, so my king wins the next one. High card. The nine.

Helen The nine. "I like this, carry on." And if you hold eight, five, two of spades?

Tom Nothing to get excited about. Low. The two.

Helen The two. Discourage. You've just communicated without speaking.

Tom Some couples spend years trying to achieve that.

Helen Some couples never do.

Helen Now, scoring. This is where bridge reveals that it was secretly an accounting exam all along. Get a pen. Bridge players pretend they do this in their heads. Some of them are lying.

Tom I've got a pen.

Helen Trick scores. Each trick over book scores twenty in clubs or diamonds, thirty in hearts or spades. In no-trump, forty for the first trick, then thirty for each one after.

Tom So three no-trump is forty, thirty, thirty. A hundred.

Helen A hundred, which is a game. Then the bonuses. Make a part-score, fifty. Make a game, three hundred if you're not vulnerable, five hundred if you are. Go down, and the opponents get fifty a trick if you're not vulnerable, or a hundred a trick if you are.

Tom Vulnerable means bigger rewards and bigger penalties.

Helen Exactly. Let's score some. Four hearts, making four, not vulnerable.

Tom Four times thirty is a hundred and twenty. It's a game, not vulnerable, three hundred. Four hundred and twenty.

Helen Four twenty. Three no-trump, making four, not vulnerable.

Tom Three no-trump is a hundred. The overtrick is another thirty. Plus three hundred for game. Four hundred and thirty.

Helen Two spades making three, vulnerable.

Tom Sixty for two spades. Thirty for the overtrick. Not a game, so a part-score bonus. Fifty. A hundred and forty.

Helen Four spades down two, vulnerable, not doubled.

Tom A hundred a trick. Two tricks. Minus two hundred. Ouch.

Helen One no-trump making two, not vulnerable.

Tom Forty, plus thirty for the overtrick, plus fifty for a part-score. A hundred and twenty.

Helen And three no-trump making three, vulnerable.

Tom A hundred, plus five hundred for a vulnerable game. Six hundred!

Helen Six for six. And at the club, a little machine on the table does all of that for you anyway.

Tom Now you tell me.

Helen So, the rules to take away. One: against no-trump, lead the top of a sequence, or the fourth highest of your longest suit. Two: against a suit contract, lead partner's suit, the top of a sequence, or a singleton, and don't lead away from an ace. Three: from three cards headed by an honour in partner's suit, lead low. Four: a high card encourages, a low card discourages. And five: game is worth three hundred not vulnerable, five hundred vulnerable, and a part-score is worth fifty.

Tom Homework?

Helen The lead drill. Deal four hands. One of you bids a contract for North and South. The other, holding West, chooses the opening lead and explains why.

Tom And "it felt right" isn't an explanation.

Helen It is not. Then the signal drill: one of you leads an ace, the other signals and says out loud what the signal means. It's the only time in bridge you're allowed to say it out loud, so savour it. And then a mini duplicate. Deal four boards, keep each hand in its own pile, play them and write down the scores. Then swap seats, replay the same boards, and compare.

Tom That's how the club does it.

Helen That's exactly how a club duplicate works, minus the tea urn.

Tom Helen, that's it. That's the whole workbook.

Helen That's the whole workbook. You now know more about bridge than roughly ninety-nine percent of the people you'll ever meet.

Tom That's a strange and specific kind of power.

Helen Use it wisely. Come and play at a supervised session. Bring your practice partner. Bring your questions.

Tom And when I've done that for a while?

Helen Then there's a whole other podcast waiting for you, called Next Steps in Bridge. I hear the bloke on it is very good.

Tom Thanks for listening to Bridge Homework. See you at the table. Leave the jokers at home.